After much self-torture and pep talks with my reflection, I have come to the safe conclusion that everyone’s journey is completely different. From my newfound wisdom, I am here to tell you to embrace your unique journey: you are enough. How did I realize this, you ask? Well, let’s just say it sprung from my self-pity and the continual reminder of my inadequacies. I had reached a phase where every Instagram post made me question my account balance and life choices in general and where every glimpse of people’s love lives made me sigh and say, “God when”.
This was until I had to tell my heart to calm down because the reality is that this life indeed no balance, which is why I cannot kill myself. The good thing about feeling sorry for yourself is that if you’re smart enough and in love with your mental health, you start to see things clearly and then you give yourself a pep talk. On the other hand, feeling sorry for yourself could throw you into a ditch that would only get deeper with every struggle. I went with the former, and I slowly realised that out here on the streets, nobody is airing their dirty laundry for the world to see.
Everything is about perspective. You must gradually and consciously remind yourself that there is more than meets the eye. Am I saying that these people are fake? No, but I am saying that there is no need to put yourself under unnecessary pressure just because the person beside you is on a 4-hour call with their partner while you interlock your fingers and imagine it is someone else holding you. Do not be quick to look down on yourself or water down your accomplishments just because the next person seems to be doing better; the fact that you are not where you were yesterday is an accomplishment in itself. It is only you as an individual who knows where it hurts, and sadly, people would rather keep a straight face and pose for social media than cry for help.
The pressure is so real, it’s slowly driving us crazy. I guess the day I first learnt this lesson was when a friend whom I had envied for a long time, cause to me, she was in a perfect relationship and had her career all figured out, burst into tears and gave the whole “behind the scenes” struggles that no one had ever heard of. I had to pause and come to the realization that I had been beating up myself, wishing for something that someone was desperately trying to throw away. The uniqueness of our lives and journeys is so surreal, which is why you must always embrace yourself with genuine kindness cause YOU ARE ENOUGH!
Sometimes we spend so much time living in other people’s shoes and wondering how our lives would be if we were born into their worlds. Well, here’s a check for you; you are yourself, you’re where you are right now and sorry, no amount of “I wish I was this person” would change that. But before you dive into a sea of self-pity and comparison, remember that we are all humans striving to find our unique paths in this world. The best thing you can do for yourself is to grow into someone you can always envy. Picture the best version of yourself and be that person. Not someone else but an updated version of yourself.
P.S.: On those not-so-good days when you need a little cheer, we will always be here to remind you of just how awesome you are; so click this link and let’s get talking love! https://www.justhummingbird.com/contact-me/